Tator...part 1

Nov2
We walk into her house. Immediately we see the arms of a tiny, beautiful little girl, fly open wide. She's wanting a hug from us all. And of course we would love a hug from her too. She is much smaller than we imagined. We were told she was small..but seeing her brought it to reality. Standing beside me was my super tall Bug who is actually younger than this little girl and they looks years apart in age. But her smile and bright blue eyes make up for her tiny little self. She says 'hey' to us all and goes about her business playing.

We see her father sitting on the sofa and go over to him. We are huggers, so we of course hug him as well. You can see the sadness in his eyes as this decision has been so incredibly difficult. He loves her, no doubt. We heard it in his voice when we had talked before, but to see it in his eyes as he looks at his daughter confirms it all. We talk about lots of things. He and Hubs talked about sports and kids and random things. There was really never any awkward chit chat, and it really felt as if we were visiting old friends. The case worker and I talked for awhile about adoption in general and our families and our views on the world, etc.

I sat and read an Elmo book to this bright blue eyed little girl and watched as she and Bug and Hulk played well together. We didn't really know how they would behave or understand what this visit may mean and I prayed they understood and also prayed that their hearts were guarded. But as I watched them read books and play cars and build blocks and play in the pretend kitchen, my heart smiled.

And hour or so into the visit, the case worker asked me what I thought of this bright eyed little girl. And I smiled (my heart was smiling bigger) and told her I thought she was wonderful. My heart was guarded for many reasons. The case worker than began to talk to the father about what he was thinking and he confirmed that he felt like it was going well and he wanted to move forward. She spoke to him about time-frame and he wanted a longer transition. Maybe Christmas? Maybe Thanksgiving? Either was fine with us...we understood that this was hard and that a transition may be best anyway.

Soon after, we said our goodbyes. That little blue eyed girl gave us all hugs and kisses and said goodbye. We left feeling good...and a bit anxious...and a bit scared. But we knew that if this was God's plan, than He would reveal it. We left with this little girl and her dad in our hearts...

more in Part 2...